draw near

During the week, most of my days look like this: Wake up, get ready for the day, go to worksite, stay there until time to go somewhere else, come back to lodging facility, freshen up, eat dinner, have nightly worship with the teams, do trip journal, and go to bed. Then repeat. 

I've found it difficult to find a period of time in the day to meet with God. But you say, you're on a mission trip. How could it possibly be hard to stay intimate with God during a time where you're constantly thinking of serving the Lord? The sole purpose I'm here is to serve God, love Him, learn from Him, and do everything He has called me to. So why is it hardest to keep an intimate relationship going while doing His will? 

In James 4:8, it says "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you". Draw near. Although I'm here serving the Lord, if I'm not drawing near to the throne, I won't feel Him moving in me. When I find myself without talking to my Father all day, I'll say 'Well, God knows my heart'. Yes, He does know my heart. But He's also a Father who ENJOYS hearing from His children. Just think of how much it fills your heart when someone who dearly love, pours their heart out to you because they trust in you. Isn't it the same for our God? And He is so much bigger than ourselves therefore He's ready to hear about our days and what we feel. Draw near to Him. 

If you read my previous post, I said a prayer through my blog. Every post I do in Haiti, I want to end in a prayer so that whoever might read, will pray the same. I want to open myself up and be vulnerable in my struggles. I felt a need to talk about having difficulty drawing near to God through the weeks in Haiti but I almost didn't because I didn't want people to know I'm struggling in that area. I'm realizing I don't have to keep on a front because we all struggle in some way. 

Daddy God, it's hard to have an intimate relationship with You through these long, hard days. I'm constantly making sure I've got team names down, I'm building a relationship with them, or out on a worksite constructing a home. While I love all of these, it can be draining and exhausting. Daddy God, I see You working through all of that but sometimes I just need to be alone and have time with You alone. I need to be filled by Your spirit, Your Presence in order to give myself to others. God, I completely trust You with everything in me. I know that You can make time for me to meet with You in the stillness. I know that You can give me rest to fully be awakened by Your holiness. 

Come to Me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and my burden is light. 

Matthew 11:28-30